I hear a lot of people out there saying that they can’t do this or that, making excuses why they can’t do what they actually really want to do. We are all human here, I have been that person myself. I can understand that it hurts to try and fail. It’s scary to push yourself to your stretch zone and step into the unknown.
As humans we tend to want to always feel good about ourselves, so of course being uncomfortable is something we naturally seek to avoid. But by avoiding discomfort, we are limiting ourselves, we aren't living our lives to our full potential and we most of all aren't chasing those dreams that we really actually do want! But let me tell you something. If you really want to commit to yourself and your goals then you need to start getting comfortable with the uncomfortable right now! Here are some tips to get you started.
Usually showing up is the most uncomfortable thing to do. That first step is hard! It doesn't feel nice! I can tell you now though, this is the most important thing you can do for yourself. Without it you really have nothing. You aren't even trying to seriously fulfil your goal (harsh but it is true). Show up and the battle is half one.
I think it is really important in this step that the decision to show up for yourself comes from within because once you start, once you show up, you are probably going to want to quit (because it doesn't feel nice!) If the decision to start comes from within then you are going to feel more committed to yourself to carry on taking further steps forward. While you need to make this decision for you, don't feel like you have to do it entirely alone, tell a friend and rally some support to get going.
When the going gets tough (because it will) remind yourself that this is important to you and use that motivation to continue despite the challenges.
Don’t give up, don’t give in
Like I outlined previously, once you start you will probably want to quit because it feels yuck. Oh well, that’s life, don’t quit now! If you do then it will be even harder to get back on that metaphorical horse! I don’t care how small your steps are, I don’t care if they aren't always going forward, you cannot quit.
I talk about failing a lot when it comes to pushing yourself and not meeting the goal. To me this isn't really failing, to me failing is not showing up and quitting after you have shown up. Those are the only two times to me that I would consider that a true failure.
Does the challenges you are facing scare you? Good! I hope they do! This is the discomfort you need to find comfort in if you want to continue fighting on for you. Just because something is scary or hard aren't reasons to quit. It doesn't matter how you feel, you just need to do what is right.
Embrace the suck
You went out there, you faced it and you sucked. These are challenges we all have to face sooner or later. If you don't then I can tell you now that you aren't pushing yourself hard enough. If you aren't pushing yourself hard enough then you aren't really stretching out of your comfort zone so the whole exercise is becoming a little pointless if you are striving for progress.
Just because you showed up, doesn't mean its not going to suck, doesn't mean its not going to be uncomfortable but these are the exact situations you need to be putting yourself in to do better. I can think of 100 times recently where I have sucked and then the following week things have been much better because it sucked the week before. Without it, we are going nowhere fast.
And guess what? Every time you are in this space and becoming comfortable in it you are giving yourself more power, you are making yourself stronger and more resilient to take the next steps forward. It will hurt but thats totally okay and expected if you are doing something you really care about.
Enjoy your moments of greatness and nurture them
It is easy to focus on when things are going south and beat yourself up about it. Some people may even tell you to be critical of your performances to improve but that isn't going to help you build confidence. You may not have had a great day but the key is to always focus on your great moments and identify things that did go well. If you tell me there was nothing then I don’t believe you and I hope you unfollow my page right now. There is always something.
This doesn't mean become delusional in your mind about how great things are and miss the fact you will always have something to improve and work on but I label those things as just that- areas to work on. This way I am not becoming negative or despondent about my weaknesses. They are just areas that need work.
Rinse and repeat
It’s just that. No matter how the day has gone, get up, show up and do it all again tomorrow!
Look for opportunities always to stretch your comfort zone! I used to be so afraid that I would never even ride in front of anyone or push myself but no I live for the failure now, I learn so much more from it than when I win and I love the strength and resilience that you gain from embracing challenges.